Watch this video. Then think and talk about what you would do to help out.

CHECK IN & HELP OUT

At the SAFE Bar Network, we partner with bars and other alcohol-serving venues to create a workplace culture focused on using active bystander skills to increase safety and give everyone a safe night out.

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1. Notice concerning behavior.

The majority of the time people are made uncomfortable or hurt by someone that they know. So throw that implicit bias, those preconceived notions, and myths about how people are harmed out the window. Yes, the person who gives you the creeps may be a problem, but the charismatic person who is working the room may also be a problem. Shift the focus from ideas we have about people to observable behaviors and body language. Believe people when they share a concern or ask for help.

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2. Learn bystander intervention skills.

In SAFE Bar training conversations we talk about three simple active bystander skills you can practice every day. 

Notice. Trust your gut. If you see someone is uncomfortable or unsafe do something to help. 

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3. Take Action. For far too long we’ve talked about bystander intervention as if there is only one solution – be the hero, and confront the person causing the problem. Yes, that works. But there are so many other options that work just as well and may be better for the situation.

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· Direct: Talk to the person causing the problem, check in with the person being hurt. 

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· Delegate: Get your outgoing friend to say something, check in with the people around you, and make it a team effort. 

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· Distract: Create a clever distraction by starting a conversation, or say you need help finding the restroom, this is your chance to be creative.

Give Support. Get Support. There are going to be times when you take action and it feels really good. But there are also going to be times when you try to help someone and it’s a bit more complicated. Tell someone you trust what happened and when the time comes, be ready to pay it forward by offering support to someone else. Learn how supporting others can change the culture, watch here.

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4. Give drinks to people who want them.

If you are out having a good time, check with someone before you get them a drink. If you notice that a drink is made for someone who doesn't want one, take a second to check in and see if you can help. If someone wants a beer but their friend insists they have a shot, get them the beer. 

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5. Find their friends.

If someone has had too much to drink find their friends. People working in the food and beverage industry tell us in every training conversation we facilitate that when someone has had too much to drink the best thing to do is to find their friends. Help them find the group they came with, the friends who left an hour ago, or their roommates who decided to stay in tonight. 

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6. Talk about it. 

Whether you are a member of a team at a bar or restaurant, security at a nightclub, or someone out with friends to have a good time. If you notice something is off, someone is unsafe or uncomfortable talk about it with the people around you. Let the staff or host know what is going on. 

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7. The host is your friend. 

Whether you're hosting a small gathering, throwing a summer bash, or you work at a bar, restaurant, nightclub, café, coffee shop, etc. let guests know that you want them to have a good time and that you are there too help. Let guests know you are there to help: greet them when they walk in, let them know you want them to have a good time, and if you notice they are uncomfortable or unsafe check in.